The Short: Leave a comment to win The Lee Bros. Southern Cookbook.
The Long: Contrary to what you may believe about last names, the Lee brothers are not Chinese. Do you know any Chinese men - or men of any Asian nationality for that matter - named Matt or Ted? Matt, maybe because it's short for "Matthew" which is from the Bible, but Ted?
Matt and Ted are totally white. In fact, the Lee Brothers are so white that I couldn't put the entire cover of The Lee Bros. Southern Cookbook in the picture because their shining white faces caused too much of a glare.
However, that is not the reason why I am giving away this cookbook that the publishing company so generously sent me to review several months ago. That would be racist, and if there's one thing I am not, it's racist! I have a good friend who's white.
I am giving away this cookbook because...after quitting my job, I finally found myself with the time I didn't have before to do basic, everyday things that I have to do like clean my apartment, pay bills, go through stacks of magazines still in their protective plastic mailing covers, eat, and of course, take showers. Everyday things took all of three days before I was left again with time on my hands. Gloriously lounging around my house in blue silk pajamas like a small Asian female version of Heff lost its glamour when buxom bunnies didn't show up after seven-and-a-half hours, and strangely enough, it had been so long since I had experienced "leisure" that I had no idea what to do. I was at a loss.
For all of about sixteen seconds.
Good Lord, I can read. Books. Yes, I could finally read the books that had been sitting in precariously unbalanced stacks around my apartment for months. Novels. Short story collections. Non-fiction. Cookbooks. I finally got to lay on my bed for hours at a time, stomach down, A-for-Asian chest propped up on three pillows with a notepad and extra fine point Sharpie and flip through as of yet untouched cookbooks.
I am giving away The Lee Bros. Southern Cookbook because I flipped through it, was charmed by the sincerity of the prose and the purity of the recipes, and want to share things like Sunday Fried Chicken, Red-Braised Beef Short Ribs, and Bacon Cheddar Grits (!) with someone.
Plus, I need to distract you eleven readers while I compose a thoughtful essay about the Red Velvet Cake with Cream Cheese Frosting I made from a recipe in the book (this ostensibly makes the book "used" but let's just ignore that technical detail for the sake of this rare little display of generosity, 'k?)
The Red Velvet Cake (cake, not cupcakes) is coming soon, but for now, leave a comment and I'll randomly draw a winner when the number of comments is sufficient enough that I don't look like that awkwardly short girl at the Bloomfield Hills Middle School monthly dance who stood in the corner by herself during "Eternal Flame" and "Glory of Love."
That never happened to me.