Oh yes it's ladies night
And the feeling's right
Oh yes it's ladies night
Oh what a night...
A few nights ago, when I really needed a night out to get my mind off of “boys,” (actually, one silly boy in particular) Liz and the four Jenns (kind of like the three Heathers in the movie) came over to kick start the evening. It was ladies’ night.
the four jenns are...cosmos!
Liz is a gorgeous redhead with glittering green eyes, who always looks fantastic in turquoise and baby blue. The Jenns, all four of them, are dolled up and accessorized in shades of pink. They’re petite, slender, and totally transparent – so very LA. The Jenns are...cosmos. Instant cocktails-to-go in uber girlie packaging. Liz brought them over start the evening of forgetting about him. ;)
I had actually seen these portable insta-cocktails in the liquor aisle of the market many times and would slap myself when I found myself almost buying them after thinking *high pitched voice in my head* omigod, how cute! Down, girl, down! Wow, I almost let my inner Hello Kitty out of her closet. *phew*
if hello kitty were a cocktail...
The reason I couldn’t bring myself to buy the Jenns myself is that it costs almost $15 for the case of four bottles, going against all budget logic. I could buy an entire 750 mL bottle of Absolut (on summer sale, of course) and a half gallon of cranberry juice for $15 and marinate the entire second floor of neighbors in my apartment building. And maybe even a few stragglers from the first floor. A single bottle of Jenn, *doing the long division now* at $3.75, is hardly the size of an actual cocktail, and even all four together might bring on a mild buzz, and that's on an empty stomach. It’s only 17% alcohol. Bummer.
The drinks don’t taste all that bad, but for how much it costs, I would expect a little more. Maybe it should taste like liquid Louis Vuitton (it didn’t). Maybe it should transform me into some pinked-out princess animé version of myself with fresh-from-Jonathan’s bouncy hair, a girlie figure with impossible measurements teetering on stilettos, driving a Dream ‘Vette with a teacup yorkie in the passenger seat (didn’t happen, thank God!). But Cocktails by Jenn are not so much for the drink function as they are for fashion. Let’s face it, the stuff is brilliantly marketed for grown-up girls, who are always willing to take out a second mortgage on their Malibu Barbie mansion to pay for “cute.” For what else is a $120 wife beater tank top than the glittery packaging? Alright, alright, so I have a few of those, too. But, what else am I supposed to wear for Ladies’ Night?!? *cue music again*
Sam says
what flavour are they?
you need yourself a bottle of real hard core girly pink drink with credible fruity flavour
Pricey, but not if you compare it to those ditzy jenns!
Fatemeh Khatibloo-McClure says
Aaah. We don't have these in SF yet (that I've seen, anyway) but I saw them in LA last time I was there.
They seem to be on-par with the Sophia bubbly-in-a-can, which is also all about fashion and not about form.
But Sam is right -- the Hangar One Raspberry is all girly happiness. Straight up, on the rocks, shaken with a wee dram of framboise... slurpability factor is entirely too high.
Anonymous says
Things seemed to be going so well with the boy, I's had turned into We's and chicken was even tasting better.
sarah says
the cocktails by jenn actually come in a few flavors - apple martini, blue lagoon or something like that, lemon drop, and a key lime martini (i think). we had cosmos, and i a not a cosmo girl, despite my favorite color being pink *chuckle*
and great. now i will be on the hunt for hangar one...thanks, ladies! ;) i'd love to have that with a splash of club soda. that would be delicious, i think!
LACheesemonger says
hMMM! Only 3 comments so far, disappointing I should say. Other than Sixy Sultry Sammy ;) , is no one else interested in the saga of Sarah's sex(y) life????
And here I thought in today's fashion of the century... marketing anal retentive types (let's forget about the problems of the 3rd world country's where people don't even have running water or electricity) always tell us that sex sells... LOL. An opportune moment to ask generalized questions about how 'da princess' likes her cup of joe in the mornings.... Eblog etiquette and such???
Well I hope 'da princess' doesn't consider a flurry of posts to this thread/topic 'spamming' by yours truly... cause I know of a LA based Korean-American 16yr old that has her own blog that has been besieged by porno & gambling BOT postings. Unlike the uber mature (:-) ) Sarah, this actual 'girl' uses 4 letter words like a seasoned salt sailor.
http://www.applegoddess.org/blog/
Alright here goes in no particular order (censor, delete button get ready ;-) )
BTW, you know Lana Lang (Kristin Kruek) is the most Pinka-power woman I know of. Smallville fan forums deride Lana's constant pick accented outfits, while fanboy's just drool constantly at anything KK wears on SV. hehe. Pinka-power, pinka-power!
LACheesemonger says
Hah, Vette. LOL, I think Michelle Kwan was pictured in a red hot Vette convertible in Newsweek for the 2002 Olympics (ah well, grace, style, finesse, character/soul of female skating has been overtaken by pure theatrical technical physicality of spinning tops athletic prowess… Peggy Fleming RIP; MK last of the graceful-artistically feminine skaters who looks uber hot in Vera Wang; and is ever more high-energy, boatloads of ‘big-brain’ personality than our own ‘delicious life’).
Me thinks Korean hottie Sarah would look better in a tangerine brides dress in this complimentary tangerine Lamborghini Gallardo (heh, AWD 500hp and completely impractical at $180,000…. So LA), uber hottie and K-Pop fav Hiyolee, Fine Killing Liberty singer/turned actress (aka Hi-Yori Lee… ah well, if it’s better to spell it in Korean than to try and put it into English)
http://www.bjunkyard.com/gallery/data/506/7306photo_016_449.jpg
http://www.bjunkyard.com/gallery/data/506/7306img_14_709_0.jpg
Better yet, to match da princess’s red hot, strong/fortunate bold red colors, how about this skintight Ferrari “racing red” jumpsuit (Armani could do no better ;) )? Better yet, I’ll ignore the model and just drive away in the Ferrari F430… $180k of pure unadulterated, Italian ‘con brio’ style sexiness…Vette owners need not apply.
http://gallery.muzi.com/pfg/english/1006414.shtml?pfm=10073052
However, whenever in doubt, multi-orgasmic handmade Belgian chocolates always do the trick, preferably Wittamer. They may look like other Belgian chocolates, but one must not judge a book by its cover. Omakase, trust me, a kilo box of these, air freight to most parts of the world, will do a great job of making you forget just about any ‘silly guy’. (I'm so wicked, the 'decadent life')
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v103/udaman/Wittamer-chocs.jpg
=====
A few more posts to follow, so Sarah, where would you like me to post my Sat/Sun SM & Hollywood farmer's mkt travails, one weekend, Four farmers mkts!, with a few pics of the best of the best of this weeks produce? I think I have a few more witty posts ;) for this 'theme'... please check back tonight.
Rachael says
Have you tried the Mini Sophia's yet? Sparkling wine in a can. SO fun.
:-)
Rachael says
Wouldn't liquid Louis taste like rawhide? Ick.
And as for Jonathan, that lamer. He had all of his stylists double their prices when he started that silly show, and now my hairdresser defected and they won't tell me where he went! AURG! I swear, I leave town for two lousy months and all heck breaks loose!
sarah says
if Louis Vuitton were edible, i just imagine it tasting like luxurious french buttered rum. kind of like how prada would taste sleek and sharp, like vodka straight up out of a pure silver martini glass. :)