November was so busy it finally brought me to breakdown, but I don't have to talk about how melodramatically fem-otionally sensitivelame weepy I was again, do I? It was like that time of the month...for the entire month, which probably explains why blogging was so spotty. (Gross, did I really just blog that out loud?) Blackberries everywhere. Literally.
December, as it always is for everyone, will be three-, if not ten-, times more intense. The Holidays are a schizophrenic happy hell on earth.
I can't wait.
Wednesday, November 1, 2006 - Summer Raspberries...in Autumn? October in Review
"I would swear that it was just yesterday that I was out on my veranda in nothing but a tennis dress eating fresh yogurt and summer's raspberries"
Friday, November 3, 2006 - Sham Mediterranean Cuisine - The Princess and the Pita
"I am quite certain that if people looked beyond the tiny pedestal with paper take-out menus that stands in the doorway and pathetically begs passers by to stop and come in, Sham wouldn’t feel the need to run low-budget commercials on local access cable TV at 3 am."
Saturday, November 4, 2006 - Air Conditioned - How Shabu Shabu Scored Me a Drink
"Who needs JHarmonyMatchDotCom when you can write about shabu shabu on a blog?!?!"
Sunday, November 5, 2006 - Santa Monica Bar & Grille - Third Time's (Not) a Charm
"If you serve Spinach and Artichoke Dip with bad, curiously chewy chips, the Dip will taste like crap unless you scrap the chips and eat it with a spoon straight out of the bread bowl as if it were Clam Chowder on Fisherman’s Wharf."
Saturday, November 11, 2006 - "Foodie" - I Shall Not Wear a Badge of Shame
"There is nothing wrong with loving luxury. I love lounging around in my cashmere negligee and diamond tiara eating toro on my chinchinchilla fur rug."
Sunday, November 12, 2006 - Ramenya - The Rules of Date-gagement
"You should never take a girl to nicest, fanciest, most expensive restaurant in town because she will expect that level all the time, and if you’ve already taken her to the nicest, fanciest, most expensive restaurant in town, you have nowhere else to go from there but down."
Thursday, November 16, 2006 - Our Second Date - Learning a Little More About You
"Really, please answer and save me the embarrassment of sitting alone at a table for two, on my second glass of syrah, being stood up."
Saturday, November 18, 2006 - The Original Soup Man - Yes, Soup For Me!
"My friends are pretty much fawesome (kind of like 'fugly,' but fawesome)."
Monday, November 20, 2006 - Il Moro - Good Thing it Doesn't Suck
"If I have to Spread my Sheets and Point my Power in a gray drab office decorated with dry erase process flowcharts on white boards, at least I’ll look good doing it."
Tuesday, November 21, 2006 - Dohl - More Pink than Hello Kitty and Her BFFs Drinking Cosmos at the Spa
"In every other normal, logically-minded culture, families spend a lot of time and money, and a lot of money (not a typo) on a party with lots of gifts and a pair of mimes for entertainment for their kids who will remember the pain and embarrassment of everything that their family did for them to show them how much they love them, even if in your family "love"=shiny new 325 convertible (!) and in my family "love"=book (but it's hard cover so that means we really love you)."
Wednesday, November 22, 2006 - Tacomiendo - Night Time Nachos
"Both the guacamole and pico de gallo seemed like they were long past their prime. Of course, it was 10 pm, but I'm talking about their prime three days ago."
Thursday, November 23, 2006 - Thanksgiving is My Favorite Holiday...in My Dreams
"I finally get to see all of my family, all at once, in a giant Asianized version of a Normal Rockwen turkey-centered tableau."
Friday, November 24, 2006 - Domestic Bliss is a Dysfunctional Thanksgiving Dinner
"I am blessed with a relatively normal family, but what the fuck happens to them the moment the clock strikes 12:01 am on the fourth Thursday of November?!?!"
Saturday, November 25, 2006 - Pumpkin Bread Pudding - Ugly Bready
"My pumpkin bread pudding, even accessorized with dried cranberry bling, was basically Uptown's battered and bruised downtown ghetto crack den cousin."
Monday, November 27, 2006 - Turkey Vegetable Soup - If Roasting Were Labor, This Would Be the Afterbirth
"All that remains on the polished-just-for-Holidays silver platter is a horrifying pile of bones, a gruesome mess of shredded skin, and random bits and gristly body parts that are not suitable for describing out bloud."
Tuesday, November 28, 2006 - Roast Turkey and Cranberry Sandiwch - Can't a Blogger Just Eat a Sandwich?
"Once the entire NASA-approved plate is heated through in the microwave, they add a dollop of cranberry sauce and sit down to eat what is essentially a homemade Swanson TV dinner."
Thursday, November 30, 2006 - Black- and Blueberry Pomegranate Smoothie - Battered and Bruised
"I actually stopped for a moment to watch the blender pulverize perfectly plump, glittering, sparkling-with-diamond-ice frozen blackberries and blueberries into a seedy, pulpy black and blue mess, wholly unidenitifiable from its previous life."
** a year ago today, i was pickled tink by a teeny tiny mention in the LA Times **