I often wonder if it would be worthwhile for the world to adopt a change to the calendar. We could keep the year at 365 days, 12 months, but instead of every month counting at or about 30 days (except February, obviously), each following month should grow progressively longer.
January should be one week. No one likes January that much anyway, so the last day of January as the 7th wouldn't be such a bad thing. February should be two weeks because if we actually cut it off before Valentine's Day, we would wipe out the entire greeting card industry (as if email hasn't already done that). In fact, March and April aren't that exciting either so those could be two weeks, too, except that it greatly shortens the chances that your birthstone will be a diamond. If we add a week to each successive month, by the time October rolls around, a month would be something like seven weeks long. Imagine October lasting a full seven weeks!
Then maybe I won't feel like every year, the four weeks of October seem to fly by (even if the pattern is full).
It was a hectic month. My life went from the relaxed pace of leisure blogger to web 2.0 whore. I can't go into all the details right now and trust me, no one really wants to know. For one thing, I can hardly remember everything off the top of my head. If it weren't for my obsessive list-making and compulsive record-keeping of everything in Excel, I would swear that it was just yesterday that I was out on my veranda in nothing but a tennis dress eating fresh yogurt and summer's raspberries, even though I took the photo months ago.
Maybe I will write about November soups and stews next Spring.
Sunday, October 1, 2006 – Johnnie’s Pastrami – Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Pastrami
"I never thought I would ever say this, but there was too much meat."
Monday, October 02, 2006 – Almond Joy Martini - Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut
"And I still had a wicked headache in the morning."
Tuesday, October 03, 2006 – French Onion Soup - Maybe I'll Shop at Trader Joe's More Often
"You will feel like Julia and Jacques maybe didn’t make that soup from scratch for you right there in your kitchen, but you will at least feel like they unwrapped the package for you."
Wednesday, October 04, 2006 – PF Chang's China Bistro - Chinese, Quote Unquote
"That silky soft tofu in what appears to be mapo tofu but is actually some strange concoction of the mad scientist back in the “kitchen” will constipate you harder than sandpaper-wrapped bricks through a drinking straw, and yet, alternating with fire-rrhea from prescription dosages of hot sauce you were forced to use to numb the pain of blandness."
Saturday, October 07, 2006 - Golden Gopher - I'll Take a Nerdy Martini, on the R0xx0rz
"Any other time of the year, at a much later time of the night, the place would be filled with smoky, smudgy eyes, mink stoles, and stiletto heels balancing on arms of fedoras and shirtsleeves."
Sunday, October 08, 2006 - Enterprise Fish Co - What Does This Have to Do with Curry?
"Its underwhelming blandness was a bowlful of shame."
Monday, October 09, 2006 – Sushi Tenn - "10"
"Somewhere deep in my subconscious sensory memory, its harmony of flavors and textures will be etched like the first ecstatic moment that you know you had because it didn’t hurt, but of which you can’t express any detail because it was like you were unconscious."
Tuesday, October 10, 2006 – Michi - How We Define "Social Life"
"Dynamite...that dish that is supposedly a melange of scallops and clams but is actually mushrooms in an obscene disguise of mayonnaise with one or two suspicious “shellfish”-like bites that comes out in either 1) a small, heat-proof dish with high sides or bowl with low sides, or 2) multiple layers of aluminum foil hastily shaped into a makeshift vessel that will hold semi-solids, something like Gladstone’s leftovers, but not a swan."
Wednesday, October 11, 2006 - Shade Hotel, Manhattan Beach - No Splendor in the Grasshopper
"My glass looked like Irish Spring Easter egg dye."
Sunday, October 15, 2006 - Jer-ne at the Ritz-Carlton, Marina Del Rey - Champagne Wishes, Caviar Dreams
"To be quite honest, I could have gone the whole brunch just reaching over from my seat to the cheese table and eating blue cheese."
Monday, October 16, 2006 – Torafuku - Like White on Rice
"I was certain that the place would be doomed because people would be afraid to say “Hey, let’s do Torah, fuck you” for fear of being labeled one of those fanatical subversive ex-Jews raising their fists in anger."
Thursday, October 19, 2006 – Did it Hurt? Just a Little - Dine & Dish no. 7 Like a Virgin
"No more beating around the bush. Let’s just get down and dirty."
Sunday, October 22, 2006 - Chocolate Chip Cookies, the Simple Life, and BFFs
"...the life that is not encapsulated within the virtual pages of a blog or a Profile page, are really really awkward. Like actually saying “lawl,” spelling out “o-m-g,” and pausing for uncomfortably long intervals between statements."
Tuesday, October 24, 2006 - Mini Snickers Brownies - Why I Bake, Even Though I Suck at It
"I think it's a sickness."
Wednesday, October 25, 2006 – Work Lunch Paradox and Greek Salad Tragedy (by Koreans)
"Even if your group does the pass-the-bill-pay-what-you-owe on the honor system, everyone knows that Edward from Accounting never takes into account tax and tip. And he's from Accounting!"
Friday, October 27, 2006 - Friday Doughnuts and Other Signs I am Officially Corp
"Why do we have doughnuts on Friday? Why not Monday? Why not any other day? My morale is just as low on Tuesday as it is on Friday! In fact, my morale on Friday is the weekly highest because it’s fucking Friday!”
Saturday, October 28, 2006 - Red Rock - Just a Good Effin' Bar with Good Effen Vodka
"They have taken 'anti-Sunset' a little too far on the surface to the point that it felt like a dive on purpose. As if they were trying to make that point."
Sunday, October 29, 2006 - Bodega Wine Bar - What "How Are You?" Really Means
"The bartender said they did have a sparkling wine “in a can,” but the look on his face and the tone of his voice made it clear that I’d be better off drinking Alka Seltzer from a Capri Sun pouch."
Monday, October 30, 2006 – Fresh Corn Grill – I Didn't Eat Corn. Neither Did He
"Incidentally, I can never say the word "corn" out loud again because I have used it so many times in this post that it looks weird to me."
Tuesday, October 31, 2006 – Happy Halloween! - The "OC" Stands for Octopus and Cupcakes
"Personally, I thought the cupcakes looked like very ripe peaches with mad faces."
** a year ago today, it took a little asian persuasion to dine and dish **